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Surrender is not possible at all if you believe because belief is of the head, and surrender is of the heart. Belief means you are convinced logically, intellectually, that what is being said is right. The argument appeals to you. Belief has nothing to do with the heart, it is absolutely of the mind, a mind phenomenon. Belief is not a love affair.

Belief means intellectually you are convinced because you cannot see any argument that can destroy it, all the arguments that you can manage prove it. But deep down there is bound to be an undercurrent of doubt. Belief cannot destroy doubt, it can only cover it up. It can cover so perfectly that you may forget about the doubt, but it is always there. Just scratch any believer a little bit and you will find the doubt there. That’s why believers have always been afraid of listening to anything that goes against their belief.

The Catholic Church goes on prohibiting the Catholics: “Don’t read this, don’t read that.” They go on putting books on their black list, which are banned for the Catholics. The Vatican library has thousands of tremendously beautiful documents; for thousands of years they have been gathering all those scriptures that they have burned, banned, prohibited. But they have kept a few copies in the Vatican library just as a historical past, and what has been done in the past and what has been destroyed in the past – some proof of that. Anything that went against Christianity was destroyed.

The same has been done by Mohammedans, by the Hindus, by almost all the believers of the world. Why this fear? – because they are all aware of the fact that the believer is not free of doubt, the doubt is there and anybody can raise the dust again. Somehow they have managed to settle it, somehow they have covered the wound, but the wound has not healed. It is there, and underneath the cover it goes on spreading.

People believe in God, but does that mean their doubt has dropped? If the doubt is no longer there, what is the need of belief? Belief is an antidote, it is a medicine. If you are healthy no medicine is needed. If there is no doubt in you, no belief is needed.

Belief is very superficial, it divides you. The believer is only the superficial part of you and the remaining part, the major part, the nine-tenths of your being, remains full of doubts. There is turmoil within every believer and he is afraid, really afraid to come across something that may disturb his belief – and anything can disturb his belief.

Communists are not allowed to read anything against communism. In Soviet Russia, the government does not allow anything that goes against communism. Why this fear? The fear is because they know that if things against communism come into their country, people will start thinking again, their doubts will arise.

The first thing you have to understand is that believing is of the head and surrender is of the heart. Surrender is not a belief, it is not an intellectual conviction – it is just the ultimate in love. You cannot give any proof for your surrender; you can give a thousand and one logical proofs for your belief, but for your surrender you cannot supply a single proof. And whatsoever you say will look absurd to yourself, it will fall short. Surrender has a transcendental beauty, and belief is so ordinary and the proof is so mundane.

That is the trouble, why people feel a little embarrassed if you ask about their love. If you ask a man why he has fallen in love with a certain woman he will feel a little embarrassed. You are asking something which cannot be answered, hence the embarrassment. Why? He can manage to say something, but neither will he be convincing you nor will he himself feel that it is worth saying. He can say the woman is beautiful, that’s why, but these are all rationalizations, not reasons for his surrender. Surrender has no reasons, no motives at all. Surrender simply means a happening, not a doing. Belief is a doing: you do it, you make every effort; but surrender happens from the beyond. You are simply possessed by it.

Lovers know it, how they become possessed. If you say, “Because the woman is beautiful,” the other person can say, “But nobody else has fallen in love with her. And she has been beautiful even before you had met her, and she is beautiful, but I have not fallen in love with her. How come you have fallen in love with her?”In fact, that is a rationalization, it is not true. Somehow he is trying to save his face. He does not want to say that he does not know why it has happened – it has simply happened. He does not want to accept that he is living something irrational, that he has allowed something illogical to happen to him.

The reality is, the woman looks beautiful because you have fallen in love with her, not vice versa. It is not because of her beauty that you have fallen in love, otherwise the whole world would have fallen in love before you. Just the opposite is the case, she looks beautiful to you because you are in love. Love beautifies.

Falling in love with a man or a woman is the lowest kind of love. When you fall in love with a Buddha or a Christ or a Krishna it is the highest kind of love, the crescendo. It is just far out! It is outlandish! You cannot even give any reasons for your ordinary love – what reasons can you give when you fall in love with a master? There are no reasons at all.

Just the other day Vivek was telling me a joke. She said, “Do you know why the Jews have short necks?”
And I said… [Osho shrugs his shoulders]
And she said, “Yes, that’s why!”

When you love, what can you say except shrug your shoulders? And if you go on shrugging your shoulders the whole day you will have a short neck.

Anna, you ask me, “Is it possible to surrender without believing?”

Not only is it possible without believing, it is only possible if there is no believing. With belief there is no possibility – belief is a false substitute. Surrender happens out of trust, and trust and belief are not synonymous. That is where Anna is confused: she thinks trust and belief are the same – they are not. Belief is of the head, trust is of the heart. Belief has arguments about it, trust has no arguments. Belief is intellectual, trust is supra-intellectual. You cannot say a single word in favor of your trust, and if you say you can be immediately refuted very easily. Any fool can destroy your argument for trust because in fact there is no argument possible.

You say, “My heart says to me that to surrender and to believe is the same.”

It is not the heart, it is the head. You are confused. You don’t know what is the heart and what is the head – and this is the case with almost everybody. People live through their heads. Even if they love, they love via the head. They say, “I think I am in love.” I think – that comes first and then comes love. It is not a question of thinking at all, whether you think or not does not matter. If you are in love, you are in love. Love does not come via the head.

You say, “My heart says to me that to surrender and to believe is the same.”

No, it is your head which is telling you that both are the same – to believe is to surrender. This is the language of the head, belief is the language of the head. Surrender belongs to a totally different dimension, it has nothing to do with belief. That’s why belief can be disturbed, but surrender cannot be disturbed.

This has been my experience of working with thousands of sannyasins. It almost always happens that whenever a man comes to me his approach is intellectual. There are a few exceptions, it is not an absolute rule, but it can be said that almost ninety-nine percent men are head oriented. When a man comes to me he comes through logical conviction. Listening to me, trying to understand me, if he feels convinced he becomes a sannyasin. But his sannyas has not much value. Any day he can drop the sannyas. Anybody can destroy his belief because it is based on logic, and logic is just a game. If you come across a person who is more logical than you he will destroy your proof.

I have never come across a single proof that cannot be destroyed. In fact, to prove anything is difficult. To disprove is very easy. If you say, “The sunset is beautiful,” it can be argued it is not, and more easily. Anybody can object, anybody can say, “Give me the proof! What do you mean by beauty? What is beauty?How can you prove that this sunset is beautiful?” And you will be at a loss. You know it is beautiful, but that knowing is not of the head, that knowing is of the heart – and the heart cannot argue, it simply knows.

The problem is: the head has all the questions and the heart has all the answers. The head has all the doubts and the beliefs, and the heart has only the trust. That is the flavor of the heart.

There is a beautiful story by Chekhov, a parable:

In a village there was one man who was thought to be an utter idiot, and of course he felt very offended. He tried in every way to convince people, but the more he tried the more it became known that he was a fool.

A mystic was passing through the village, and the idiot went to the mystic and said, “Somehow save me – my life has become impossible. The people of this place think I am an idiot. How can I get rid of this, because it is torturing me day and night. It has become a nightmare! I am even afraid to face anybody in the town because wherever I go people start laughing. I have become a laughingstock! Only you can show me the way. What should I do?”

The mystic said, “This is very simple. From tomorrow morning, start asking people such questions which cannot be answered.”
He said, “For example, what?”
The mystic said, “If somebody says, ‘Look, how beautiful is the rose!’ you immediately raise the question: ‘Who says? What is the proof? What is beauty?’ If somebody talks about time, immediately ask, ‘What is time?’ If somebody asks about God, ask him, ‘Give me the proof!’ Somebody talks about love – don’t miss the opportunity – just go on asking. Don’t make any statement from your side. You simply ask the questions and make people feel embarrassed because these are the questions nobody can answer!”
Within seven days the villagers thought the man was one of the greatest geniuses, because now he was not making any statement, so he was not available for them to refute. He was simply denying others.

That is the whole art of atheism: just go on saying no, and nobody can convince you. Yes comes from the heart, and the head is very efficient in saying no. And nobody can prove…nothing can be proved by the head. And the higher the value, the more difficult it is to prove.

When men come to me they come through the intellect, their sannyas is not very reliable. But when women come to me, and of course again there are exceptions, but very few – the same proportion. Ninety-nine percent women are going to remain sannyasins. That’s why I have given my commune to be totally disciplined, to be controlled by the women sannyasins – for the simple reason that their approach to me is through the heart, they are more reliable. One percent men are reliable, one percent women are not reliable – they can drop sannyas. But ninety-nine percent women are reliable, they come through the heart. Nobody can refute their hearts; their approach is through trust and love.

You have to understand the difference between the head and the heart. It will take a little to understand it because the society has made everybody confused. Everybody is in a mess – nobody knows where the heart is and where the head is. Just be here – Anna is new – soon you will be able to feel the difference clearly.

You say, “I cannot feel the difference.”
- Yes, right now it will be difficult, but become a little more silent. In silence the distinction will come very loud.

You say, “I want to believe. I need to believe!”
- That’s why it is difficult for you to know the difference. You are desperately in need to believe, you are afraid not to believe because you don’t know anything about trust. Once you know of trust, who bothers about belief? Who cares? Belief is nobody’s need. It is the strategy of the priests imposed on you that belief is a need – it is not a need. Trust certainly is a need, is a nourishment, but belief is just artificial food, maybe very colorful, but not nourishing.

You say, “If you say that meditation is the source and I do meditation, I believe you, I trust you.”
- Please, trust but don’t believe. And of course, meditation is the way, the source – that’s why I have given you the name Dhyan Anna. Dhyan Anna means meditation, prayer. Through meditation you will come to prayer. Prayer is the highest form of love, of trust. Through meditation one finds the heart, and prayer arises. And through meditation ultimately one finds the being.

And the moment you have found the being there is nothing more to be found, you have come home.